Solitary Retirement
7 April 2007A Chicago lawyer had been practicing law for 25 years in downtown Chicago and began to think about retirement. His wife had passed a few years earlier and they had no children. His parents had been gone for several years and he realized he was all alone in the world. After spending so many years in an urban environment like Chicago, he wanted to do something different with his retirement. He narrowed it down to two choices, 1. Find an island paradise in the South Pacific and spend his final years on a beach watching tourists and young women in bikinis. 2. Buy a ranch out west and fulfill his lifelong dream of being a cowboy.
He talked with a real estate agent who specialized in finding vacation homes in exotic locations and the agent said he would see what he could find. A week or two went by and the agent faxed over some pictures of a ranch he found in Montana that seemed ideal for the lawyer. The ranch included 3 sections of timber and pasture at the base of a mountain, a house, barn, and two corrals. The ranch would cost $1.4 million dollars which was about all the lawyer could afford, but it was beautiful. The more the lawyer looked at the pictures, the more he was certain this is how he should spend his final years. He called the real estate agent to close the deal and resigned from his law firm.
A few weeks later the Chicago lawyer arrived in Montana and began moving into his ranch home. For the first few weeks everything went perfect. There was good hunting, fishing, and a beautiful view in every direction; but the lawyer began to feel lonely. He didn’t think he would ever miss Chicago, but it was difficult to go from such a busy life to one of solitary seclusion. Then one day he saw a rider on horseback approaching his ranch. It was a giant of a man wearing chaps, spurs, a denim shirt, and a big ten gallon hat perched on top of his head. The lawyer thought this cowboy looked like a cross between John Wayne and Arnold Schwarzeneger. He didn’t know what the cowboy wanted, but he sure hoped he was friendly.
The cowboy waved his hat with a big, broad grin has he rode up and shouted, “Howdy, neighbor. My name is Bill.” The lawyer felt so he relieved and immediately responded, “Howdy friend, my name is Jim.” Bill got off his horse and shook Jim’s hand. He said, “Well Jim, I’m sorry it took so long for me to get over here and welcome you proper. I just finished fall roundup, but now I’m done for the winter and I should have lots of time for us to get acquainted. In fact, we’re having a party over at my place this Saturday to welcome you proper. There will be lots of food, whiskey, singing, dancing, and a little later, with some luck, maybe a little lovin’ going on. Now you have to come, we won’t take ‘no’ for an answer.” Jim thought this sounded great and said, “I’d love to come, it all sounds wonderful. Tell me, what should I bring?”. Bill replied, “Oh hell Jim, you don’t need to bother with bringing anything at all. It’ll just be the two of us.”
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